Reflections

As 2013 comes to an end, I've thought lots about what has happened and what I've achieved.  I've also spent a long time in the last few months trying to put behind me what has gone and how different life has become. 

Yes I've has cancer,and while the effects of that are frankly pretty rubbish it's opened doors to me, it's shown he who my friends are and helped me find new ones through the sarcoma online support group. Being able to express yourself and get out those emotions and worries is essential to emotional wellbeing, (something I wasn't very good at initially) 

I have also come across Shine, which is a support network for younger adults with cancer. I'm looking forward to meeting some of those people next week, which will be nice after chatting online. 

So onto positive things of the year include:

Two of my best friends have got married (to different people not each other)

Three of my best friends have welcomed 4 babies into the world 

My cousin welcoming a little girl into the world. 

Catching up with a friend I've not heard from in a long time 

Achievements of the year include : (yes they are mainly sarcoma centric)

Sitting up for the first time unaided.

Managing to stand and walk to the end of my bed

Taking my first shower unaided

Putting on my own socks

Making my own lunch (even though I did drop it on the floor walking to the table) 

Not having a panic attack in the MRI! 

There is a long way to go, but I'm getting there. 2014 is going to be a positive year, yes there is more surgery to come, but I'm now under the care of the therapy teams I need to be to ensure I get the best  of my surgery and the best possible outcomes. 

A dip, but where is my pizza?

Now there is a phrase I never thought I would say to a delivery driver.  I think this is honestly the most ridiculous situation I have ever been in. 

Last Friday I honestly thought I was being pranked. I ordered myself a dominos and waited for it to be delivered. Spendng £9.99 to mean I ddnt have to leave the house. 

The delivery driver arrived, opened the bag the pizzas come in and handed me a dip. A dip! Only a dip. 

He then proceeds to ask is that everything... Er no, I've not paid £9.99 for a dip. I didn't even get a pizza box, just a dip.  Going through my mind I'm thinking "this guy is totally having me on isn't he..." 

When I say no, I ordered a pizza he proceeds to search through this flat bag that I can totally see is empty, it was comical the way he runs his hands through it, in the way you search your bag for the house keys. 

He then says he will have to get them to make me a new pizza up, and goes to phone, only he rings my mobile, and proceeds to get ratty when I say I am not dominos, you've dialled the wrong number! 

I eventually get a pizza, no word of apology about the whole episode, although it is cold an unappetising... I have no idea how long it has been out for, and I try to phone up the store to complain about the whole farce, but I get hung up on when I ask to speak to the manager. 

I tweeted my annoyance and complaint, and was asked to write to customer services, which I did, and received a reply telling me to speak to the store manager.... Well I tried but got hung up on. It's not like I want to try that again, and even more annoyingly I said in my email that I had tried to speak to the mangager so it seems to me, my email was not read properly and instead a generic send to all email sent out.  

I don't know what makes me more of an unhappy customer, the original, here is your order; dip but no pizza saga, or the robotic uncaring manner within which Dominos customer services seems to operate. I have also noted that on twitter, dominos does not reply to tweets, it writes a new message @ the person who has tweeted them, meaning other people cannot see what dominos are corresponding about without a bit of faffing round.  Clever and sneaky. 

The whole thing is ridiculous, and it would probably be a bit funny if the pizza wasn't so expensive. 

Georgina Anderson Two Thirds Of A Piece

Tragically earlier this year another young life was taken by sarcoma. Georgina was just 15 when she died having learned of her diagnosis only months earlier.  Georgina was a very talented musician. Her only wish before she died was that her music would be heard by many.  Well before she died make a wish, twitter and Facebook helped her YouTube videos go viral, and she learned that one of her original compositions would be released.

Her family and friends are doing ther best to get her single to number 1 in the charts for Christmas. It's a beautiful song called a Two Thirds Of A Piece.

Find it on google play here

Google Play Two Thirds Of A Piece

Or iTunes here

iTunes Two Thirds Of A Piece 

Proceeds are being split between two charities,  Teenage Cancer Trust and Cancer Research UK

The melody is simple, but catching and so beautifully sung and played. It is a lovely song and I don't think you'd regret buying it. 

Let's try and get it as high in the charts as we possibly can, for Georgina, her family and friends. 

The Knork and a BPI

I have a brachial plexus injury after a tumour was removed earlier this year, it means I have very limited use of my hand and as a result have some difficulties in everyday life.  All those things you do without really thinking, buttons, zips laces, your bra are all suddenly much more difficult.  Never mind cooking cleaning and eating.  I am unable to grip in one hand and struggle to hold cutlery to cut my food, and as a result have been reliant upon others to help or face making a right old mess, well I saw mentioned a Knork, to assist people with limb disabilities and thought I must try one. 

A knork? I hear you say. What's a knork? Well, most of you will be familiar with the spork- the spoon fork combination. The knork is the knife fork combination,  but unlike previous incarnation of similar utensils this does not have a serrated edge, and instead relies upon the shape of the tines and the thickened edge to cut food when the user applies a rocking action. 

Tonight I used mine for the first time (with great excitement) and I am very excited to report that within two minutes I had mastered the technique and was eating independently! Now, according to the label which shows a user using it on a steak this should be possible, I shall look forward to trying this out on other meals and reporting back further! 

      

What do I want to do?

Ever since I was very small I wanted to be a teacher,  it was my focus my passion.  

As a Brownie leader while at school it secured this thoughts and further work experience sealed the deal. I really had to be a teacher.  Despite my struggles at school I got through my GCSEs and A levels,  got to university where we found I was dyslexic, I still had this desire to teach, to share the way I access the world and make school a better experience for others. 

I graduated with a 2:I and went on to do my PGCE. We then moved to a new area and I did supply work to get my face known and to settle in to life in a new city, a vast difference from a small seaside town. I got my first job, to start my NQT, then I got sick. 

I was put in a position where I pretty much had to decide health or job, (this was before we knew how serious my illness was) I chose health, I was told I'd regret it. 

So now, I'm at a point a year on, where I'm thinking what I want to do, I'm still unfit to go back to teaching, and probably would not be in a position to do so until next September, however I'm unsure. Do I want to? My passion and talents lie in teaching the youngest children, but I can't get down on the floor, I can't be on their level, I can't sit on the little chairs, I can't tie shoelaces or do little buttons, all things that are important, yet going into. Key stage 2 I get frightened by my dyslexia as I don't want to mark things correct that are incorrect as I've transposed numbers and words. 

Do I even want to go back into a school? The thought sends me scared, terrified actually, do I want to be in that environment that I nearly pushed me into sacrificing my life as that is what the end result could have been if I'd succumbed to the pressure. 

Then I think if I don't teach, what do I want to do? I've got £30,000 of student loan debt in order to become a teacher and it seems such a waste to throw that away. I think I want a job I can leave at work. Where my home time is home time and I can spend it with my lovely partner. I wish there was an easy solution, a magic ball to give me the answer or someone to guide me through this desicion. I want to feel some sort of satisfaction from my job, but I wider what will give me that.