No Makeup Selfies

The recent trend of the no makeup selfie on Facebook has left me feeling raw. Posting a picture of yourself with no make up on is not raising awareness of cancer. Likewise with the secretive underwear colour, or where you put your handbag, quite frankly it's all a load of crap.

None of those things help someone become more aware of the symptoms of cancer, they don't inform someone how they should check their breasts, skin, testicles or vulva. It doesn't tell them that they should be aware of pains amd swellings elsewhere in their body, or a change in the colour of the whites of their eyes or disturbances in the vision. No one likes to talk about toilet habits, but you should be so aware of what is normal for you, you need to know your body. 

Obviously, not everyone wth symptoms will have cancer, but it is far better to go speak to your GP sooner rather than later, where you can be referred on and treated sooner if it is cancer. It is well known that cancers dagnosed in the early stages have better survival rates. 

Raising awareness and support come from actions and words. The recent pancreatic cancer "I wish I had breast cancer" advert was shocking, but it highlighted the horrific 5 year survival statistics, and went on to inform people of the symptoms.

Direct those with cancer to charities, services and groups that can provide support, charities like Shine Cancer Support, that has local and virtual networks for those in their 20s,30s and 40s with cancer. Cancer is isolating, and can throw life plans into disarray, it can be hard to talk to those around you, but talking to someone of a similar age is invaluable. 

I was 27 when I was diagnosed, I had had symptoms for over two years bit ignored them as I thought my GP would tell me my pains were all down to sitting on chairs far too small at work and that I should be more aware of my posture. Even when I was having my tests for the malignancy I thought "it's ok, I'm young, it won't be cancer" the truth is, cancer does not discriminate by age, sex or race, nor is it only skin deep. It can effect anywhere in the body, literally. Mine was in the nerves. 

Around 0.35% of cancer research funding budget is spent on Sarcoma research, and when you think there are over 50 types of cancer it really is horrific to think about that so little is known about those cancers. We  need to raise more funds so that adults and children with these cancers stand a chance. Just because they are rare does not make them any less worthy of research.  

Pancreatic cancer is one of the biggest killers yet has a spend of around 1% of the research budget. 

I'm all for raising awareness and supporting  of cancers obviously, but please do it in a manner that is informative, or is helpful in the fight against cancer. A photo won't help save a life, but giving information to inform someone how to check and be aware or helping to fundraise for a specific type of  cancer might just be the difference that is needed. 

You could save a friends life by arming them with information to help them save their own life, that in my view is more important that posting a photo with no make up on. 

Use the links below for more information on different cancers.  Please let me know in the comments if I've missed something, I know I will have done. 

Shine Cancer Support

Sarcoma UK

Beating Bowel Cancer

Blood Cancers

Coppa Feel

Orchid Cancer (male cancers)

The Brain Tumour Charity

Pancreatic Cancer Action

Gynaecological Cancers

New beginnings

Last weekend I was privileged enough to meet more than 20 other younger cancer patients in their 20s   30s or 40s as part of a fabulous weekend of activities.  Each of the participants has experienced a cancer diagnosis at some point as a young adult and as such were all on the same wavelength. 

One of the sessions I attended focused upon work, after 15 months off sick I am getting to a place physically and mentally where I want and can think about returning to work. I had been in a quandary for a while about what I want to do, unsure if I want to return to what I trained to do or if I want to break  off and do something different.  Cancer changes your priorities and so much about teaching just doesn't seem important to me. One of the activities in the work session was helping people in our small groups see through their question. Well, my peers suggested a pros/cons list, careers questionnaires and then trying out those suggestions. 

In the last week I have completed my pros/cons list for staying in teaching where each point was rated 1-10.  My pros for staying in teaching scored  a mere 60oints  the cons, 140 points. I will repeat in a month, but it seems pretty conclusive, teaching is no longer important to me.  I have looked online at jobs, amd I have found jobs that excite me in the ways I got excited about applying for teaching posts. 

So today we start a new beginning, I'm not Thirteen the Teacher, but I'm Thirteen, a daughter, a partner, a friend, a leader, a swimmer, a singer, a listener, a survivor.

Don't be labelled by your job, you are not your job, you are so much more than it. I feel often we are led to think success is determined by your job, by the label, doctor, nurse, teacher, solicitor. But are we really "successful" if we have achieved those positions? 

"Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts" Winston Churchill 

"Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome"  Booker T Washington 

Every day  leads to a new tomorrow, another opportunity to start something new, but don't wait until tomorrow to start living. 

 

    The celebratory I've completed my first 1km walk since surgery! 

Friendship

It's strange how things happen, how things can show you who your friends are and how important you are to them. 

In the last year I have been shown unparalleled kindness from virtual strangers and my "in the flesh" friends. When things first kicked off last year and I ended up going back and forth for diagnostic tests hours away from home some lovely people from a forum I used to frequent a lot decided to do something nice. When you've spent more time on trains and in random hospitals (3 different ones in two weeks) than you have at home, and having spent a months wages on travel and subsitence while there, the fact that people I'd not met for the most part cared enough to help reduced me to tears, the kindness overwhelming. Their kindness gave us enough of a buffer for us not to default on the mortgage, and left money for fuel for my partner who spent up to 5 hours a night on the road to go see me when I was in hospital for my surgery. 

Kindness comes in many forms, be it a card, a text to ask how you are or a phone call, my visits were few and far between other than my partner but it was so much appreciated to see a smiling face and have a hug. You miss those sorts of connections when so far from home, and a hug from a "ward mate" is comforting but not quite the same. 

Post flowed in for me while in hospital, even bouncing between wards and the thought and care that went into them was lovely, earplugs for when the flatulance orchestra gets too loud were greatly appreciated, but to know someone cares brings a smile.

Currently on my bed is a masterpiece,again this was created by the lovely ladies of the forum and it's beautiful patchwork crochet and knitted blanket, in vibrant colours and patterns it's beautiful, with the words forum force emblazoned on it. Forum force is something someone would ask for on behalf of themselves or someone else in a time of need. The blanket symbolises to ne the friendship and connection we all shared through a place where many of us wasted many hours and years, but it never was a place just about soap. It was a community, a group of friends and I'm pleased to say I can call those ladies (and gents) friends. 

They have listened, shown understanding, stopped me from panicking and generally held me together. There never really will be enough ways to say Thank You, but I hope they know how much of a difference they have made my life and in making a proper crap year, bareable.  I will pass forward their kindness and generosity where I can in the future. 

*here ends a really soppy post*

Five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes

Five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes, a year I will never forget, a year that has moulded me, changed me, given me an understanding of how your life can change in a blink and how  you can find out in the very worst way the best and worst in those with whom you share your life.

A year ago today my roller coaster journey with cancer started, not that we knew it then, and perhaps I was a little blind in what was happening in thinking everything is ok, in ignoring my symptoms but I was on track to being diagnosed with a Soft Tissue Sarcoma, a group of cancers that make up only 1% of all diagnosed cancers each year in the UK of which there are then approximately 50 subtypes.

No one will never truly understand the emotion and how soul destroying it is to be told you have cancer but it really is like the most recent Macmillan advert. Everything sort of clouds over and feels all very surreal and hazy, then it was almost as if  my world was pulled from under my feet.  There you are not long out of University, starting to make your way in the world and suddenly this massive hurdle is placed in front of you.

From friends, to employers I've seen and heard the best things and the worst about both from various support networks, I know now who my true friends are, and I will be forever grateful to them and my family for all they have done for me and continue to do for me.

My last set of scans were all good, so now properly begins the task of getting my life back on track. Cancer will always be part of my life, but I hope with each day, month and year that passes that it will continue to be a smaller part of it.